WHEN PEOPLE FIGHT: THE WHY AND THE HOW

WHEN PEOPLE FIGHT: THE WHY AND THE HOW

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This content was taken from Youtube. Find reference at the end of this article.

Have you ever witnessed a very intense fight?

How many people were fighting?

What were the reasons for the fight?

What was your reaction to the fight?

Do you remember being in an intense fight yourself?

What led to the fight?

How do you feel about it now?

Please share in the comment box the answers to these questions.

See how they fight

The worst fight I have seen.

I have seen some really intense fights which turned bloody but non compares to this one that I witnessed in my second year in high school. I have not been able to forget this one because never have I seen two people fight the way these two did. I don’t know what actually brought about the fight. I was on my way to class when I noticed these two boys under a tree. It started with a push but just like lightening strikes a tree, it zoomed from push to heavy blows. Both boys tried their hardest to land a fatal blow on each other by all means. I could see tactics in this fight as each worked hard by targeting consistently a vulnerable part of the other’s body in order to disable the opponent in the most hurtful way possible.

I watched and heard loud collisions of blows on skin but didn’t hear the yelps that should have accompanied the landing of these blows.  It was as if killing the other person was more important than feeling the impact of whatever hit them. It was terrible. I did not try to separate them; I would have been hurt if I did that. Some other students did and they all got hurt in one way or another.

Did they really mean to kill each other?... Actually, I think they did.

When I was involved myself

My parents have told me about how very stubborn I was as a child but truth be told I don’t remember ever being in an actual brawl. I do remember getting really angry at someone once during a football match for tackling too hard.

I felt a rush of heat run up my chest when I realized how stupid an ‘important person like me’ must have looked on the ground after Haggoe (the name of the causative agent), tackled me down. I felt humiliated and felt like I looked weak lying on my back after a ‘weak’ tackle from him. So I leaped up and swore (I guess on someone’s grave; I don’t remember) to do same to him. Then I charged at him, intent on humiliating him just the way he did me.

I did get to him and push him down. I was surprised when he made no effort to avoid my attack or attack me back. Just as I felt vindicated and turned to see if there were any approving gestures from my teammates, I saw my friends simply declare one after the other that they were no longer interested in playing the game. I realized that our little fight had soured the sweetness of the game and it was on my account.

Why do we fight?

1.       We know we are fragile

Our bodies are soft and weak and we know it. It does not take a lot of effort to actually kill a person. It’s that easy because we don’t have outside covering that protect our skin. It probably takes more effort to kill or injure most animals than it takes to injure or kill a person.

We all have this knowledge hidden somewhere in our sub-conscious mind. It is suppressed until we remove the benefit of doubt that keeps it locked away. You’ll be surprised the things you are willing to do once you free your mind enough to allow you to do them. The instinct to utterly defeat and rule over fragile things exist in every one of us. Thus, when people fight, they are simply thinking, “Don’t dare take me lightly. Let me show you that I can decide to let you continue living or simply end you”; something like, “your life is in my hands”.

2.       What we feed on

Close your eyes and imagine what you’ll do if someone threw a blow at you. You see? You already know what to do not because you invented the move but because you have seen other people do it and succeeded many times. I am talking about movies and video games. Some people even practice the moves they see on television. I bet you know where to hit if you want to render someone unconscious.

These fighting scenes are firmly logged into our memory and we are all prepared to execute them when we feel threatened. Another time that we anticipate using these skills is when we need to demonstrate to other people that we are not weak. Eventually, that time will come. Be careful.

3.       Ignorance and Pride

In every fight or quarrel, the parties involved are either ignorant or proud or both. These adjectives are fairly distributed between or among the parties of any random quarrel. This stems from what I call ‘need-to-be-right-the-first-time’ syndrome. Correction is a sign of weakness and fragility. Therefore we will do anything to demonstrate that our position is right by all standards and that we are not ignorant or weak.

A fight is always a stamp of personality. We are ready to fight because we don’t want to back-down on our believes or what we want other people to think about us. This is the show of pride. Let’s not zoom into the debate of whether some pride is necessary or not. All I know is that in most cases, there are better ways of making other people respect you. Look for it; you’ll find it.

4.       Definitely something beyond

Think about this. What turns a perfectly lovely smiling person into a blood-thirsty convoluted killer? It can’t just be some rush of chemicals. You are never impervious  to the changes that take place in your body. You are very aware. Thus I conquer that there is much more than meets the eye. I refuse to simply limit it to character. This is my argument:

DEMONS: wait, wait wait for it…

Read this Holy  Bible verse very carefully.

James 4:1 to 8

1 What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? 

2 You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. 

3When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. 

4 You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. 

5 Or do you think Scripture says without reason that he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us ? 

6 But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” 

7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 

8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

This scripture encompasses all the points I raised earlier but goes further to describe that the reason people get red enough to engage in fights and quarrels is because they are far away from God and so are not able to resist the devil. Let the scripture speak to you on this.

How to avoid fights

Fights in all situations, even in boxing and wrestling, is in no way justifiable. It is dirty by all scrutiny. How then do you keep yourself from getting involved in a fight or more…

a.       Draw near to God. James 4:8

I have decided to take this point first because it is obvious from the Bible text. People who make conscious efforts to make their spiritual lives better find that they deal with anger and malice better. In the famous Matthew 5 verse 39, the Lord Jesus Christ says, “If someone slaps you on your right cheek, turn your other cheek to him as well”

Look for these other verses too: Colossian 3:8, Ephesians 4:30-31, 1 Peter 2:1 to 3, Galatians 5:19 to 25, Proverbs 24:29, Romans 12:17 to 19. There are many more. Search for them.

b.       Filter the things you feed your mind

If you are really serious on giving up on fighting, you’ve got to stop watching violent content. That means no more of some blockbuster movies or the most trending raps or metal music. Do this intentionally. Filter what you see or hear from television, radio stations, video games and friends. If your friends are fond of talking violence, stop moving with them. Remember, your life is in your hands. Choose to be at peace and be happy everytime.

c.       Train your mind to think highly of people and animals.

Life can be really beautiful if you’ll allow yourself to see that. Concentrate on the things that make you happy enough to ignore annoying people. The mobile phone or laptop you have gives you access to powerful internet that provides you access to almost any material you want. Do you want to ‘laugh out loud?’ Simple; go on Youtube and watch funny videos. Do you want to be motivated? You have tons of materials on the internet that will make you whatever you want to be. Don’t waste it. Feed right.

d.       Beware of perception and perspective

Understanding the influence of perception in your thinking as well as knowing how perspectives can change arguments can greatly help you avoid some fights. Always beware that there is something you are ignorant of. The fact is, at anytime you are ignorant in one way or another. We all are ignorant. Just accept it. Check every tendency of feeling superior or better than somebody. If ever you praise yourself, that is pride.

You must be conscious to know what situation you are in at all times. Don’t allow peer pressure to dictate to you what to do. You must always take the final decision. So be intentional.

References

Street Fights Compilation. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYVoqo3UA7c 22/10/2018.

Image1. Retrieved from http://www.smart360media.com.ng/2017/09/photo-news-two-factions-of-nans-in.html. 22/10/2018

Image2. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEQCBDiA_70. 22/10/2018

Image3. Retrieved from. https://www.forbes.com/sites/christinecomaford/2013/08/15/crush-your-top-collaboration-killers-a-brain-based-approach/#34dbaf253f93. 22/10/2018

Image4. Retrieved from. http://rokiskis.popo.lt/2012/07/18/pasitikrinkite-ar-esate-keliu-siknapaukstis/. 22/10/2018